Wednesday 21 January 2015

Starting over in the right place

The school year in Queensland starts again next week and when it does, it will mark the anniversary of an event which changed my life completely.

From my first day in high school, it was pretty obvious to me and to my family that I wasn't really in the right place for me.  I didn't really 'fit' in the school and while I eventually found a way to make it work, it was never really me.  I was quiet and withdrawn and never had a lot of confidence. The school didn't offer subjects that I was interested in and I never really found my stride.

Over the years I learned to accept that this was how school was meant to be and would probably have drifted along until the end of my school days except for the fact that a nasty group of girls decided that it might be fun to give me a hard time and things spiralled down to the point where I was again pretty unhappy on a daily basis.  

Things finally came to a head one day when one of the group suggested that I leave and not come back and I obliged by going home and declaring that I was done with school and wasn't going back.  That was a big claim for a pretty quiet and usually well behaved daughter. But to their credit, my parents realised that things had reached the point of no return and agreed that leaving the school was the best option for me. They talked me into going back for the last few weeks of the year but once it was done, I was free to leave.

A few weeks later they approached me and asked if I would consider trying a new school. I wasn't at all keen, but after some discussion, I agreed to a two week trial where I would have permission to leave completely if it didn't work out after that. 

The first day of school was a completely terrifying experience. I'd moved from a smallish private girls school to a big, co-ed public school and I didn't know anyone.  I sat quietly through the orientation and opening assembly and kept telling myself, "two weeks, just do this for two weeks."

But then two amazing things happened.  I got taken to my first form class which was Art. This was something I had always wanted to learn but hadn't been able to do at my old school - and it was fun.  And the second thing that happened was that I made my first school friend in that class.  This girl was warm and friendly and welcoming and we just clicked.  At lunchtime, she took me off to meet all the other people in her group of friends.  And they were all warm and friendly and welcoming too! 

In the days and weeks that passed, they welcomed me into their group and I slowly adjusted to the rhythm of a big group of people.  Their energy and craziness and laughter was infectious and I came out of my shell and found my own personality.  I'm sure that they sometimes thought I was a bit weird  because I just wasn't used to the dynamics of a crowd, but they were pretty patient and eventually I found my place in the group. I hadn't really known I was an extravert until I found the right place for me.

The last few years of high school were a completely different experience for me. Music, friendship, laughter, travel. So many new experiences and so much fun to be had - and believe me, I enjoyed it all!

Looking back today, those early years don't feature at all in my thoughts because so many better things have taken them over.  While they were a difficult experience, they taught me so much about the type of person I want to be, how to treat people, and the importance of true friendship.

Thirty years later, that girl from my art class is still my best friend.  No matter how long passes between conversations, we just pick right up where we left off and I love that I have a small place in the family she had built.  Suzy, thank you for taking me under your wing that day, you have no idea how you changed my world and I will always treasure you and your family.

But the blessings didn't stop there because I still see so many of that wonderful crowd of friends from school.  We catch up at least once or twice a year for lunch and over the years through marriage, jobs, children and change, we have managed to build on the 'school friend' connection and develop something stronger.  We always have things to talk about and everyone is genuinely interested in everyone else.  I treasure each and every one of them and love that all the kids have grown up knowing one another and even as adults they still choose to join us for lunch sometimes!

Sorry for the length of this post, but there seemed to be a lot to say.  This is probably more personal than anything I would normally blog about but somehow this forthcoming anniversary of beautiful friendships seems significant and I wanted to mark it.  

I wish you all the joy of true friendship. x 



1 comments:

Anonymous said...

Beautifully put Pita x
Kim

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